Subtitles by Sagar Bhosale (Tago)...
I arrive in 15 minutes. Stop arguing.
Great, thanks. Bye.
- Good morning, Freddy. - Good morning, Abby. You are beautiful.
You're so bad?
- Good morning. - Good morning.
- We have problems. - No, Joy, only solutions.
We lost the camera and transit has b roll for the segment.
This is a problem.
Call Matt's Media Lab, he has guys who do extras.
- Where are my meteorologists? - Here.
Hello! Thank you for coming. They are fantastic. Thank you.
Have you any reason to all are overweight?
They are good for meteorology.
Research shows that acids are more forgiven.
Abby, I hate to do this, but not I work with it.
It is difficult to accept criticism home, I will not do it in the air.
- Everyone has limits. - Larry, you're not a man.
You're a journalist.
Journalists exempt things easy.
Defined by times.
Can you imagine Ted Koppel or Tom Brokaw working with his wife?
No, because they not cope.
But you, my friend, have balls the size of a Volkswagen.
Do not think I did not notice.
I always thought of them as purple but you're right,
They are large, but proportional are aesthetically pleasing.
- I think I understand. - Are you kidding?
Josh, the public Sacramento not give a damn about the extinction
Slugs Brazil. It is worthy to make news.
Know of celebrities in Rehabilitation is vital information?
- Your voice makes my hair ... - Right. He tried to kill me.
He knows he can not eat crab, I'm allergic.
My God. Someone is See that? Is urticaria?
Seems syphilis.
Just know what syphilis because I report from celebrities.
Get ready for 3.
For "cacciatore" need mushrooms and garlic, accurate.
- Place the mushrooms. - Right.
- And how much garlic you like. - Really?
- Garlic is never enough. - Sometimes it is.
- Place a heaped tablespoon. - Great, thanks.
Is it good?
I must say that is the best chicken cacciatore I've ever had.
I knew I'd like, is actually duck cacciatore.
- No. - He said 'duck'?
It is a great alternative to the chicken and taste the same.
Pato, that does not quack, quack '?
Prepare to advance the range.
Pato?
We are a family that's more like chicken.
Tell Larry to change Javier for the meantime.
- Is it good? - You did.
Javier, did you?
Can I take the leftovers home?
Are you sure not want the leftovers?
When we return, news on the transit live e. ..
Guess who is in rehabilitation this week?
Get ready for the commercial.
And you can take your slug itself, when we return.
Run the business.
- Fuck you, Rocco. - I do not know how to do it.
Just look at the chaos in the eyes and tell him to go screw himself.
It was great, thanks.
We need a new chef for the program, for sure.
Come on, Rocco is excellent.
- Abby! - What complicated.
Stuart wants to see. You are freaking out.
He saw the audience.
- Want some? - It gives me that.
He saw the hearing yesterday?
All programs station won the people,
including reruns of 'Who's the boss'
the episode in which vacuum break.
It's a little problem temporary. Things will improve tomorrow.
The guy with the TV Cable on channel 83 was better.
With reruns of Jerry Springer have 9% and less spending.
Please do not say plan to end the program.
We are not a small station, Abby.
I love you, you're great at it but needs to present numbers.
I have two daughters in college and a son in beauty school.
I do not know how much you know Vidal Sassoon, but not cheap.
I can recover. I'll recover.
You really excels. Every day, Abby.
But that's what worries me. What you are not enough.
I should not leave his seat corporate dictate the content
program. It is my program. I control.
I should miss the meeting and stay home.
Have ideas the audience.
Of course not, Abby. Should out and observe humanity.
Humanity is looking attend our program.
Yes, all 2.47% of it.
Already remarked with this guy three times.
If you cancel today he leaves.
Look at this bone structure.
It will be the bone structure their future children.
- Do not want to be symmetrical? - Impressed his profile?
What? No. These are not played for a while.
I have to live through your love life
and I think he can be Our new boyfriend.
- Oi - Hello
I'm looking for a guy with light brown hair,
body beautiful, blue eyes.
Is 1.75, I know it's kind of low, but read The Great Gatsby 2 times.
In fact, 1.73, but I read the book again to help.
Hi Can I bring water to the table?
Yes, a bottle of water, please. Thank you.
Just a second. Sorry.
Did you know that studies prove that
tap water and bottled are basically the same thing?
Passed a law to restaurants filter the water
not to be the tap, but filtered, and the bottle,
only you need not pay seven U.S. dollars for it, right?
I just like the taste.
Can bring a whiskey on the rocks also, please? Thank you.
Yes
I thought I had seen in his Profile drinking red wine.
Printed my profile?
In fact, my assistant production printed.
Not like I did not prepare, not happen.
By the way, congratulations on choice of car insurance.
- I was in my profile. - No, it's research I did.
Then,
Tell me about yourself.
What is there to say that you do not already know, right?
Truth.
You know, I actually
I took the liberty of printing some topics of conversation,
if this happened.
- It has happened before? - No.
But you have 9 of the 10 attributes necessary on my list.
My God. Sure.
This is a good, let's get to 3.
Do not ask.
More when we return, we will hear officer of the zoo
now forced to take ...
We returned to "the naked truth and Raw "and today we'll
about what men and women want the relationship.
I was browsing some books.
"Smart Women, Choices Bobas.
"Men who Love the Women hate that. "
"Women who hate Men who Love Women
They hate that loving men.
Billions and billions wasted in psychological nonsense.
Listen, ladies. Because I'll just say once.
And there are only three little words.
Men are simple.
We can not be trained.
All this bullshit "Men are from Venus"
It's a waste of time and money.
Want to be a witch lonely, great.
Continue reading these books idiots.
But if you want a relationship, so do you get one.
Is called 'Stairmaster'
Climb it and stay lean.
Enjoy and buy one lingerie and vulgar.
Because in the end, all that matters is beauty.
One falls for her personality at first.
We got the her breasts and her ass.
And we were together for we want to do.
Want to make a man, do not need 10 steps, only one.
And it's called fellatio.
And do not forget ...
Right? No.
- First call. - How to burn these books?
They helped my life more than I can say.
What do you call your boyfriend, princess?
I'm not seeing one at the moment.
Exactly what I meant, Shrek. Next connection.
In the air.
So you're saying that men are incapable of love?
I burst your bubble of romance newsstand? What!
The only thing you burst was his credibility.
Men are completely able to experience love.
Sure, I play the game, continue, who is the guy?
- What? - The face. You wonderful.
The man so capable of love. Who is he? How is it?
He's smart. It is beautiful, but do not know it.
Successful in a job that is important.
Do you like red wine, picnics, classical music.
This guy lives in America, right?
Not calling from Europe or something?
He loves dogs, but is more a fan of cats.
Never wake up before you on a Sunday morning.
Wait a second. Understood.
- Are you a lesbian. - What?
It must be, because you just to describe the perfect woman.
Why it feels so threatened by these qualities?
Is it because you do not has none,
is why women not interested in you?
Okay, I give you $ 100 of my own money
if you find this guy and I bring it to know it.
He is out there somewhere.
Wait a second. Not Single or this guy?
No, I describing a kind.
I thought that was what we were doing.
Neither knows?
Wait, now I understood. Wait.
You must be ugly like a dog.
- What? - Has to be.
Come on, you heard me.
If you were sexy, would breaking the heart of a fool
instead of spending time fantasizing with Mr. Wonderful.
Face the facts, you're ugly.
- I'm not ugly. - Let me help you.
You must accept the fact that will be alone,
and stop wasting time with a imaginary man who never will.
As you can ...
Hey, Lassie, the program called "The naked truth."
If you can not face it, not connect.
And with that finished for today.
I remember Mike Chadway the truth is never pretty.
- How was the meeting? - I liked the restaurant.
- That's great. - Why?
- Good morning everyone. - Good morning.
Before showing this, I warn that it is a bit rough.
Face it, you're ugly!
I'm not ugly.
Why are watching this?
They are looking for the new commentator.
I'll start with two segments week, three minutes each.
- Are you kidding? - Who the hell is this guy?
- His name is Mike Chadway. - E is a super idiot misogynist
that represents everything wrong television and society.
Levo scolded when I suggest do something trivial.
What is he has a point of view, not to like.
We are journalists, are goals.
Stone Phillips interview terrorists.
Not to say that like them. Does the audience.
I have ideas for increase the audience.
Will like. We do not need it.
- Do not need it. - Not really.
- An intimate portrait of the mayor? - I like it!
It's fantastic.
- Mayor? - It would be bold and intriguing.
Unless you make the climb three drugged whores
and a German shepherd TV live
one will give a damn.
Sorry, I was listening to the corridor.
What I said to you? He is not great?
Thank you, sir.
Already hired?
Who is this charming creature?
I'm his producer.
Hi
I like women on top.
God.
- Belo office. - It was just a joke.
- License. - Mike, has seen his office?
Let me show you.
Personnel, rest 5 minutes, I'll be back soon.
They were not there last year in meeting on sexual harassment?
Yes, you were there, Larry?
He was harassing me.
I am an award winning producer. I am an award winning producer.
I'm a producer ...
- You are a producer award. - Do not knock on the door?
I hit, you have missed.
So essentially his beat
was denied by his total lack of respect
the social etiquette that happens to knock on the door.
More strained than a stretched spring.
Whoo. Remember the bark?
Last night, a little chat we had the phone.
Yes! Who knew.
You're not even a little ugly.
Imagine my relief.
I wanted to thank me get this job.
Would not have done it without you.
We both do good TV.
You make a stupid waste assisted by sedentary
so busy with his hand on his pants do not find the remote control.
I was not imagining this way but is a good image.
I do not watch your program. My cat stepped on the control.
So thank her pussy for me.
Larry, Georgia, listen. I want you to eviscerate.
I want Mike Chadway is consumed in flames.
Want to be Mike Chadway a pile of ashes on the floor.
That janitor vacuuming the ashes of Mike Chadway.
And when you play them the trash out there
I want to vomit and rat shit the ashes of Mike Chadway.
I thought you were nervous and bitter.
No, Larry, this is the my vagina ignored.
Chadway, 20 seconds to air.
Ready? Larry?
- There is a bird in my dressing room. - I got it.
- Bird of truth? - It's flying there.
- Sparrow? - I do not know what kind it was.
Security should leave the doors closed.
Four, three ...
Good morning, I'm Larry Freeman. Another beautiful day in Sacramento.
I'm here with a beautiful woman.
- Um - Here we go.
Thank you, Larry. Hi, I'm Bordeney Georgia.
Shut in Georgia.
For years bothered to lowering the standards of television.
But many believe that this man and their local
have led us to a further below.
As a result, receive Mike Chadway.
How are you guys?
Mike, what you say to people call their program offensive?
It is. But the truth is too.
The truth about what, Mr Chadway?
As relationships are real.
Marriage, for example.
Is about social pressure, status and sex.
If it were not for these things,
equality nor talk.
Honey, it seems you never been loved,
and is discounting this the female population.
- Excellent. - It's like crossfire.
Very good.
Look who makes these observations, Georgia.
You project that image of perfect couple
and clearly is a lie.
How?
- Drugs. Cut to commercial. - No, no.
Stuart said to continue recording anyway.
What? When? This is my program.
At present it is not.
Come on, Larry. I watch your program for years.
You were taken off and confident.
What the hell happened to you?
And you, Georgia. She is a dumb bunny.
Knew that to flirt in order to weeks needed to be with you.
And soon she was more popular than you.
Just twice his salary.
Let Larry take him down.
Wait, friend. I am proud the success of my wife.
Nothing. Hates her success.
Feel emasculated by it. And it messes with your head.
That in turn has with their masculinity.
- What's your point, sir. Chadway? - Georgia, take control.
Georgia ...
I mean her husband not have sex with you there ...
I kick ... three months?
Chadway, this not my fault.
- I know. - Come on!
- I know. It's her fault. - Why is it my fault?
What should I do? Refuse the money for him to have an erection?
She said 'erection' on national television.
Relax, no big deal.
Speak up on Sesame Street.
- I agree. - Thank you.
You castrated his husband economically
the point that he afraid of wanting you.
Sure, you could finished with it.
But he has seen men available in Sacramento?
My God.
Difficult choice for a women in their 40s.
Forty?
God.
He just talking about her age, she will kill me.
Forty?
You will not get one better than Larry.
You have to let it be a man.
- Let him be a man. - I leave!
- You let me be a man. - I let you be a man.
- You let me be a man. - It's that easy.
Now you, frown McFlácido. Let.
- God. - Ready for the camera 3. Close.
- I'm not angry. - Yes, it is.
Come here and give a kiss this beautiful woman.
'McFlácido'? This means I think what you mean?
- Yes Kiss her. - No, no. They will not ...
- Kiss her in front of me. - This is ridiculous.
By Allah, Georgia, let me be a man!
- No! - Close the camera 2. Come!
The country does not want to see it!
And that, my friends, is the simple truth.
Get ready for the commercial. Can run.
He is a man. Mike!
Cut to commercial. Cut to commercial!
It was great! It was great? I said the guy was great.
Good work, guys!
Abby? I found it.
1143 calls more than 300 emails,
53% of women. This guy is a lightning rod.
They liked it?
If you liked him? Loved it! 93% approval.
- How is this possible? - I do not know.
'm Taking the news and giving you "The naked truth."
Stuart. You are making a mistake.
I mean, we know this face? Who is it for real?
Moved here to 10 years
played in two tournaments children. How cute.
He picked up a lot, according to the yearbook.
Three years state university.
Vendor of the Year in Dobson, 2004.
He was arrested for urinating of a moving vehicle.
- What is very difficult. - Do not tell.
Never married hates asparagus.
We just have to make him happy to renew our contract.
Congratulations?
Mike, hi, it's Lauren.
Have a party Saturday and you know what makes me tequila.
It's me, Nikki.
Why do not you call me?
I miss you.
I can not stop think of your huge ...
Who is that?
all my ...
dripping wet ...
How was school?
- Do you fuss. - What?
Last week you told me
"Where mistreat as gostosas so you will want more. "
I tried this with Shauna, she cried. And I was punished.
First of all, do not listen to I say in my program.
In addition, you should do this with girls 25 years
who are very tasty and irresistible.
Not with girls of 14 years.
They are in puberty, already have problems enough.
Mom said when she was 14 was the most beautiful of its class.
I was there when she was 14,
and let me tell you one thing, she lied.
Do not listen to your uncle. He was blind and touched inappropriately.
What a beautiful for say to a child.
He has heard things worse in their program.
Hope has improved because it will be on national television.
Congratulations!
D'Artagnan, no! You did it!
No, D'Artagnan! Back here.
No.
D'Artagnan!
Crap.
Beauty, then go up.
I'm not as flexible D'Artagnan.
I'll get you, stay there.
Hold on. Come here, baby.
No, come here, D'Artagnan.
Good boy. Okay. Everything will be alright.
I hope we get down.
My goodness.
He uses dental floss.
My God.
Help!
I'm stuck in the tree! Help!
Anyone! I'm stuck in the tree.
Stay calm. Everything will be alright.
Put me on the floor. I can not alone!
Sorry. My goodness.
Just moved? Good.
I'm Abby, her neighbor in front.
So you are a doctor.
Orthopedic surgeon.
Guido lot of legs and hips, sometimes feet too.
Your ankle seems fine. Is a torsion. This should help.
Great. Thank you.
I was lucky my choosing cat
tree beside your window to go up.
Here I am, when you need me.
I note the number of my house on the card.
If your ankle start to hurt, call me.
Sure. Thank you.
How strange, he like men.
Dogs are great,
but I prefer cats.
Well, I think it's time to go.
- Thank you for saving me. - Nothing.
- Bye. - Okay, bye.
- If you have forgotten the cat. - Right.
Had a spider on me. I hope you have already gone.
- Great. - Beauty.
- Bye. Thanks again. - Good night.
ACCESS ONLY ACCREDITED
You will not believe how perfect it is.
- It is symmetrical? - Do not know how.
My God.
What rolled? He asked for your phone?
No, but he gave me. I call him? What say?
Easy. Breathe.
- No tap water. - No tap water.
Do not spoil.
Have I said your look is malicious?
- Everything in me is malicious. - One moment.
Will not have problem. Continue.
Sure.
Bye, Karen.
Be frank should stick to the script.
Is a live newscast.
You may not use the word "suck" at all.
If you say something eschatological I quit.
- Really? - Yes
Because I think you resign for me to be happy.
I have a list of demands I will do after the program,
let me warn you, be eschatological.
Just because is beautiful today
not mention the fury demonstrated that phallic.
When you hear my voice, do what I say.
He promises to talk dirty?
Good morning, Sacramento. I'm Larry Freeman.
- And I'm Bordeney Georgia. - And I'm Mike Chadway.
And this is "The naked truth."
Every day a few minutes,
talk of men, women and relationships.
Begin by men.
Men are simple. To demonstrate my argument,
here we have classic romantic scene.
We have candles, champagne,
and even a violinist.
Already here, we something quite different.
- This is not in the script. - Follow me.
Just the block?
Where the hell is he going?
- Follow him. - Go with him, Camera 1.
Girls fighting in gelatin.
Gelatin. Fantastic.
- There are people calling scared. - My God.
- Sit down. - Raise the monitor.
Let us see what men prefer.
Classical music environment candlelight.
Or half naked girls fighting in a strawberry mixture.
Crap!
If we do this, best advantage.
Two, get ready to enter live. One, focus on his hand.
Lamba gelatin finger her.
Just do it.
I was wrong.
It is cherry.
Let us return to the studio, Georgia. Later.
Next, visit the aquarium
and see how it is Penny, the dolphin.
She can jump 3 meters with a ball in the nose?
- When we get back. - When we get back.
That trio.
Great job, girls.
I am like you in mouth, if I understand.
Did you know that Archbishop Desmond Tutu has participated in the program?
And who is this?
I do not think we were so low because it is not smart enough
to check the references.
Hold on. We work well as a team.
You told me to lick the jelly.
You understand how much I hate myself for doing that?
It was a common tactic.
I'm going to hell for transmissions that
meteorologist naked Canada.
Really? A meteorologist naked?
Can we hire her?
It has to do it the audience, Abby.
Think of my son dreams of being a beautician.
Think of it, think about Joy ...
Do this for me.
Today the sun will rise partially
with clouds moving on my left breast.
No pressure will come from below then expect a cold front.
This is Mike Chadway in "Sacramento AM"
bringing "The naked truth" every day on Channel 2 at 21h.
My God.
I liked caviar
to discover that it was done eggs of fish. Did you know?
- It's disgusting. - It gives me goosebumps.
- Good morning, ladies. - John.
- The contents of yesterday. - Thanks, John.
Should be happy, right?
Yes never had an audience of 12%.
I feel dirty.
Knew the contents?
Yes, I'm the producer.
He knew that the executives will me take me to dinner next week?
I hope that you chew with mouth closed.
Why do you hate me?
Do not hate. I hate what you represent.
Hates the truth.
His concept on relations human is not the truth.
But her imaginary boyfriend true.
For your information, I met him.
I hope it is true this time, but it is pathetic.
He is real. Very real.
Not to mention that it is very beautiful and morally upright.
He is a surgeon. Orthopedics.
- You know what this means. - What?
He stuck his finger in the ass a guy in medical school.
You disgust me.
So, Mr. Ass called you out?
Not yet. We are going slowly, the first to know.
Why am I talking this with you?
In other words, it I called you out.
What are you doing?
Doctor.
Hi, this is Abby Richter calling Dr. Anderson.
- Wait, please. - I hope.
Why is linking for this guy?
- Dr. Anderson. - Hello, Colin.
Here is Abby. Her neighbor last night.
Hi You okay? How's your ankle?
Never been better.
I called to say how much I liked I met you last night.
Thank you.
I think we should go out dinner any time like this.
Has a new restaurant In French
and an art exhibition which had great reviews.
I was thinking we could go on Friday.
Friday, wow.
Saturday would be better?
Abby, the deal is that I still not set myself up right.
What the hell are you doing?
Te saving. He was dispensing it.
- It was! - No!
He is hoping you call.
When you do not connect, he'll call back.
- How do you know? - I know how men work.
If you want things work with this guy,
will listen and do everything as I say.
You probably already caused irreparable damage
its connection with that psicoagressiva and controlling,
and may even be too late.
And if you save this situation,
never be more than Abby, neighboring desperate.
I'm not desperate.
Do I seemed hopeless?
If you listen to.
Asking desperately it seemed hopeless.
Sure.
While not admitting, you know I know what I mean.
You decide.
Okay, what do I do?
Pick up the phone and say "Hello, Doug."
- Why ...? - Do it.
Hello, Doug.
No. It's Colin.
My God! Sorry.
Perfect.
Who is Doug?
A guy I'm leaving. It's nothing serious.
Sure.
- Wait a second. - Wait a second.
Bright.
- And now? - Just wait to do it.
If they wait for more than 30 seconds, may have a chance.
Nobody is waiting for something who wants to dispense.
You better be right about it.
Give me a break and I do this guy turn his bitch.
I do not want a bitch. Colin would never be a bitch.
He is a well-defined
able to have emotions mature and deep love.
Things that you know nothing.
Maybe not. But I know of lust, seduction and manipulation.
Things that you know nothing.
Abby, I make a deal.
If you do what I say and win this guy
you stop me fill the bag and works with me.
You know we can do an that program success.
And if does not work? What do I get?
I quit.
Are you really so confident?
MEDICAL GROUP
Gone are more than 30 seconds.
Sure, closed. And now?
Always cause an impression.
Let. We have work to do.
But, and o. ..?
He will call back in 5 seconds. Let.
Who are you, Nostradamus?
Amazing!
Rule number 1:
Never criticize.
Nor is constructive?
Never. Men are unable to grow, change or progress.
Their growth ends when learn to use the toilet.
And rule number 2:
Ria any thing he says.
- And if it is not funny? - Irrelevant.
A laugh is like a faker faked orgasm.
A faked orgasm is good?
No, but an orgasm is faked better than any orgasm.
But a faked orgasm is not an orgasm.
Just for you. You are not the only person in the room.
Do not be selfish.
This was perfect.
- Of a truth or a lie? - You never know.
Rule 3: men are very visual.
We have to change their clothes.
What's wrong with them?
It is a very attractive woman, but totally inaccessible.
You show comfort and efficiency.
What's wrong with comfort and efficiency?
Nothing and no want to fuck with it.
- Hello! Can I help? - Yes you can.
We need to evening gowns, tight jeans
and bras that make her breasts rise and speak: "Hello"
They are now saying hello? What are they saying?
They are doing a nod,
instead of effusive greeting.
Why not try it? Will be wonderful.
This is a bra.
Your breasts will say:
"Put me in your mouth, are very tasty. "
In fact, I'm using one of these now.
The length is very important.
We want short enough to see her thighs,
but not too short to show their private parts.
This means that you are pushing it.
Really?
The jeans are for show the curvature of your ass.
You already have the raw material.
Just needs to improve presentation.
Just say have a nice ass?
My God, you always have to be so vulgar?
Rule 4: Never talk about your problems.
Men do not listen and not care.
Some care.
No, some men pretend who care.
When they ask "How are you?"
just a code for "let me put my dick in your ass. "
I think that Colin is above it,
but believe me, he is a man.
If you are into you should thought of her every hole
at least ten times.
I love how people assume that the so perverts like you.
Do not guess. I know.
Wait.
- One more stop. - What? I already have many things.
We need to let your hair longer.
Men like something pra grasp beyond their ass.
My hair is fine. There is nothing wrong with it.
Horsetail says or you works with heavy machinery,
or is emptying a box sand cat.
None of these things inspires an erection.
Why do I have to inspire an erection, and not him?
Shut up.
So?
What do you think?
Not bad.
Not want him to think I'm easy.
I do not want you to be easy.
It has to be two people: The saint and the sinner.
The librarian and a stripper.
On the one hand, to remove the face with a cold indifference,
other hand, has to be a tornado provocative sensuality.
Now you have to teach flirting.
- I know flirting. - It flirting.
"My name is Abby and I love read Tolstoy.
I also love cats, gardening picnics and romantic. "
- I think not. - Hey, man, is in his underwear?
I would not say it not grab your butt.
What's wrong with grab ass?
What is there if it is to grab it?
You're just a bunch of holes and a pair of tits.
You are a very, very upset.
I am a good student.
- Want to stop doing that? - What?
Spending your finger around. On top of me.
Why? Are you exciting?
Maybe.
How strange, I think I like it.
Really?
- Idiot. - I knew.
Nothing to teach the teacher.
- Who is? - It's Colin.
I'm not ready for this. I'm ready?
- I'm not ready for this. - Relax.
Talk less than a minute. Go.
Less than a minute? Less than a minute.
No, wait. Come here!
You're an idiot!
- Hello! - Hey!
You look great.
Thank you. I was washing the dishes.
- What happened today? - How so?
Me waiting and then not call back.
- My God! Was you? - Yes
- I'm sorry. - Okay.
Colin, would you mind call me later?
I am very busy, to go back to the dishes.
Abby, wait ...
And now?
Going well. Make him suffer.
Do you suffer. Suffer!
Abby, I was wondering if you
like to go to the game the Devils on Saturday.
He flings.
I have eye contact. Balance head if you can hear me.
Relax. It will be OK.
Do exactly what I say. When I say. Right?
Accompanies baseball?
Do something to show little interest.
Is everything okay?
- I'm fine. - It was a bit exaggerated.
- Nice try. - Well, thank you.
Why?
Well, thank you ...
for being you.
Your welcome.
Excuse me.
My god, you're Mike Chadway. I love you!
- Hey, man. What the hell? - Man, what the hell?
- What?
- I'm talking to you. - I'm talking to you.
I did something wrong?
Listen. Say you saw looking at another girl.
I saw! I saw him looking for another girl.
- Who? - That girl there.
I was trying to buy a hot dogs for us.
- Two. Thank you. - Right.
We need rapid recovery.
Make sure to eat the hot dog slowly.
Guys like to see food in format penis entering
the mouth of a girl.
- I'm sorry! My God! - No, it's okay.
I'm sorry. You know, I can take it.
- What kind of fabric is that? - I do not know. Cotton?
Cotton is the worst. Actually, leather is. After that, suede.
But I think I can take.
Wait! It's coming out!
KISS OF THE CAMERA!
- Where? - Ali! Right there!
Abby, you may want look up.
Well, Abby.
Okay, I'm watching you. I'm in position.
I can not say it was boring.
Being nice. I left in shame.
No. It is what 'm used to.
- I know. - Actually, it's good.
I got used to women who I can decipher in 5 seconds.
I can not do that to you.
He is an idiot. Te deciphered in 2 seconds.
Now say good night and put her breasts out.
Let's try one last time.
Good night then.
It definitely paid off by my crotch wet.
I think so.
No, forget it. I do not ...
- See you later. - Yeah.
- Right. - Bye.
- Good night. - Good night.
You did it! You did it!
- I did nothing! - Did so!
- It was you. - No.
Do not ask why, but I think he likes you.
- He's amazing, is not it? - Yes, it is a dream.
He meets all 10 requirements of my list.
Requirements from 1 to 9 things were not gay?
Will ignore this because I'm in a great mood.
Yeah, I heard. Groin wet.
Among all primates, bonobos monkeys are relatives
closest to man, both genetic and socially.
Especially when it comes to sex.
They use sex to end a discussion.
One of my preferred techniques.
When they find a new food source, an orgy
to decrease the tension.
Child on the set.
... something that I think we humans should consider.
No. It is not for children.
It's okay, I know it.
- Know? - Yes
Sit around all day and send in his men.
Seems a good argument for evolution, if you ask me.
That, my friends, is "The naked truth.
E. .. over.
- Excellent work, Mike. - Thank you. See you later.
I have an adult bonobo ape in my pants.
I would like to see it.
Hey, what are you doing here?
I told you not to watch program, especially live.
Need advice emergency.
Tracy McIvor I called for the ball.
I will look stupid to accept?
Idiot?
Of course not! Are you kidding?
You're winning. The women are coming to you.
You know how this is legal?
Seize the moment, right?
Now get out of here. See you at 17h, we will celebrate.
Do not forget the pizza, King Kong.
Have you ever forgotten?
He lives with you?
Next door, with my sister.
He is my nephew.
- Pretty boy. - Yeah.
Hit it.
Guess what:
Colin called, wants out me again.
My God.
How long should I wait to have sex with him?
The more you beg, he will be more involved.
So, do anything but that.
After ...
show him that under this its exterior controller
a woman is perverted expected to be let out.
I'm not a woman's panties.
You're right. I think it is without practice for what? 1 year?
No.
- Eleven months. - God! Eleven months!
How do you live? Come.
Com que frequência você...?
What about me?
- Eu o quê? - You know.
Peel the beans.
- What pod? - The pod down there ...
Gross! That's called? What have you done wrong?
No, actually call masturbating
but did not want to offend their delicate sensitivity.
So, how often?
I do not know. Number you play one?
Just wondering is it for me imagine peeling a banana
while you peel the pod.
I never imagined as were doing it.
That is not a thing I do. Not do that ever.
- It is. - No.
- Never? - No. I think impersonal.
What can be more personal than strip the pod?
I do not see, right?
But I see. Come.
You better start.
Se não quer fazer sexo com você, why Colin would want?
What is this?
What is it, baby?
What?
What, baby?
THIS THIS IS NOT FOR YOU. IS FOR YOUR POD!
What is this?
What is this, D'Artagnan?
"I Astrea.
Panties vibratory.
'll Be late. COLIN ANDERSON
Great.
He said he would be late.
What is he doing here?
- Well, you're ready. - Why?
The dinner for the executives, not received the e-mail?
No, and I can not, tenho um encontro com o Colin.
You can not go because tem um encontro?
Você não tem idéia do quão it is difficult to get one.
Well, let's get it on path. Let's go.
Come on, come on.
Sorry steal your date, friend.
No problem, you are also producers?
No, I'm the talent.
So it's an anchor?
No, I do "The naked truth.
Never seen our program?
No, our program Stewart is very common for Colin.
- He is a doctor. - Yes, he is a doctor.
He does not want to hear things as implants and oral sex.
- You talk about oral sex? - Look, we arrived.
Você convidou as twin of gelatin?
Yes, I thought would be a good idea.
Certamente não can go wrong.
Ladies, you are beautiful.
Hello, are all here.
Harold, Bob, you remember the Abby, is not it?
- Hello, this is ... - It's Mike Chadway.
And who are these lovely girls?
Something tells me that talk news today.
The table is ready, come on.
Are making a excellent work.
I agree with that.
Are delicious.
Thank you.
Então, estamos aqui para give me a raise or what?
That's my boy, always joking.
Seriously, we are very happy with increasing audience.
And we hope to increase more even the next quarter.
Ai meu Deus.
- What happened? - Nothing.
PARADISE HOT
Can you give me a minute.
- Shit. - Sorry, she is ...
- What are you doing? - Looking control.
- What control? - Da ..
Panties.
Are using now?
Yes
- You okay? - Yes
This Ceviche ...
Are delicious.
Probably best I've ever had.
It is, I will ask recipe to Chef.
Abby, wait. Fale para eles the new campaign.
You'll love it.
Course ...
Well, will be 15 seconds ...
a cada hora...
hours ...
They are so, so ...
Tell them, Mike, That's right, go, go ...
That, tell them ...
I am loving the way you're telling.
As I was saying.
What is a Ceviche?
Is unlike anything already felt. Everything.
And they are counting on Mike "The naked truth.
And they're so provocative.
ECSTASY BREAK
They are fantastic.
My God. Fabulous!
Yeah, that. You'll love it.
The enthusiasm.
I'll use the bathroom, if I may.
Sorry, buddy, this is mine.
You knew he was with him all the time?
Not all the time, uma parte do tempo.
- I thought it should end. - That's cute.
Obrigado por vir, dinner, it was kind of funny.
He likes you, Colin, can you notice.
- De verdade? - Ready to go?
I know that Abby is.
- Great. - Let?
Take care and thank you.
I think it worked.
Of course, vamos beber algo.
Bob and Harold seem happy.
Thank you for the coffee
God!
My God, are for me?
Meu Deus, Colin mandou flores.
Put me in conference when you can talk to him.
We have the festival balloon coming,
and thought about doing a story how men are full of themselves.
- It's cool, right? - No.
We do something out of the studio,
you are great interacting with the public.
Desculpe, mas acabou to say I'm great?
It is kind of is.
Also, dear.
Me diz uma coisa.
Tell me why no program New York you stole?
Prefiro Sacramento New York.
Are you serious, is like being a fish large in a small aquarium.
No.
And Sacramento is not a tank.
It's a lake. Or even an estuary.
It is a great place to create a family.
Great schools, parks clean a good infrastructure.
There are far fewer divorces here than in New York.
Yeah, well ...
Thank God, not Colin gosta de mulheres assim.
I forgot, just like Colin women with quality.
What should be admired not unlike, chicken.
Chicken? Why am I a chicken?
I saw him with the twins remember?
I saw what? Presenting the for executives?
They want to be actresses, who I am eu para acabar com seus sonhos?
Tão generoso, agora diga, you did not sleep with them?
- I did not say that. - This is my point.
Men, chicken,
prefer women clothing provocative
- That suck many cocks. - Every man wants it.
And for your information, I just sex with that read.
Wait a second, you said stick?
É eu disse, I can say dick.
You are not the owner of the word. Pau, pau, pau.
Sure, I get it.
A week ago you repudiated a idéia de um vibrador,
now you are: stick it, stick it.
- Transou Colin, do you? - No.
No!
We are hoping, will be this weekend
ele vai me levar Lake Tahoe.
A toast to break assumptions.
I am a man with a discriminating taste,
and you are a foul-mouthed.
Thank you.
So there is ...
never assume that a girl is easy or that it is puritanical.
There are many layers in the middle.
And it is your job, gentlemen, remove these layers
and find out what type of women are dealing with.
That seemed to light.
Because when you cut essas camadas, meus amigos,
- The flower garden awaits you. - And he returned.
And I know you will want to these fertilize petunias.
Thanks, Mike.
After this message, Javier us say the forecast of rain.
I hope it rains on my.
I want to go home let's review the script.
Sim, vamos acabar over with.
- Your layers excite me. - You want to see my layers?
- Ele está ali. - So?
Great news você não vai acreditar.
You're in the "Late Late Show" with Craig Ferguson.
They want you as a guest.
Craig Ferguson wants me in his show is playing.
Of course not. We.
Yes!
Hello, who are you?
- This is Rick. - I'm his agent.
When did you has an agent?
And since when make an appointment
without the approval of the producer?
É "Late Late Show".
E desde que ele se tornou a celebridade da TV matinal.
- Viu a audiência desse cara? - Sim, claro que sim.
Bem, você vai aparecer essa noite. It's all right.
- Awesome! - Come on.
God!
Joy said he wanted to see me.
I found that did a proposal for Mike
in a CBS affiliate in San Francisco at double the salary.
- Craig Ferguson é um teste. - You're kidding.
Seriously. If Bob and Harold discover, we are finished.
I need to go there, e o convença a ficar.
Vou para o Lago Tahoe this weekend.
Just do not let know que você sabe.
Come on, let it do the program, gain publicity
e convença-o a assinar us for over 3 years.
That's all we can do.
I'll try to talk to ele antes de sair.
I'll call you soon.
Thank you.
Hello, dear penis, would be in Pay TV is not for me
- And now wants to go to CBS? - Está tudo bem, srta.?
Yes, I'm just practicing my speech.
Abby, what are you doing here? I thought it was going to Tahoe.
Não consegue ficar um days away from me, right?
It is his charm never tires me.
Parece que precisa mais de uma produtora do que eu de sexo.
I have to register, see you in 5 minutes.
5 minutos!
Yes, dear.
Vamos repassar as perguntas before the interview.
Sorry because you can not ficar com o pequeno Colin.
And I'm not dismissing it, but I believe that is the case.
The penis of Colin, is about that you want to talk now?
Porque pensei em, quem sabe, talk about the program.
Yes, that's it.
Tell me, Mike, how did "A Verdade Nua e Crua"?
Bem, Mr. Craig Ferguson Irish,
I had a job selling and listen to radio much.
I started calling for them and realized
que era mais intelligent than them.
Ask for my producer, Abby.
Ela me acha um gênio, quando is not sexually frustrated.
Thousands of lives were enriquecidas por sua sabedoria.
Sorry, but you have a boyfriend because of me.
It may have started on their question, but is lasting for me.
Are acting as the controller ever?
- I am not a parent! - When registering for the hotel
asked whether or not a room with a view to the east above the 7th floor?
I like to wake up with the sun and the view.
Colin like my version Abby's not the original.
Do not criticize my wisdom, quando é prova de que funciona.
I could be transado agora.
Around here, please.
Not the most you will be on national television.
Not helping, Rick.
- Just do what you always do. - What I always do?
You know ...
You entertained millions with idiocy and they love it.
I think this is the most which already told me.
Your welcome.
He who says "the naked truth and Raw "about men and women,
Mike Chadway.
Mike, buddy.
Come, sit.
How are you guys?
Welcome, Mike.
We men think I mean, we men.
No tiny little man, but of all sizes.
We are known knowledge of matters of the heart.
But say you have some interesting ideas.
What advice would you give to the pessoas que buscam o amor?
My advice would be: Do not look.
Try lust instead.
Easier and less complicated.
Frustration sex lasts for hours,
um coração partido can last for years.
My God, tell me qual o nome dela?
Quem?
Woman who made you so it should be unique.
Well, as I say
Better public than one.
Hello, I search for Abby Richter.
Você conseguiu, ele é nosso?
Estou trabalhando nisso. Gotta go.
Where's Rick?
Foi para casa, achei que could celebrate together.
Give me a little.
And what exactly we celebrating?
Hello, Craig Ferguson, went to program it. Think he saw.
I heard the offer from CBS.
Então você também knew that I refused.
Refused?
Why?
For Jonah, it need me.
I may not be best model paternal
but I'm the only one he has.
And I do not do this San Francisco.
Bem, acho que é a great decision.
Thank you.
Can we stop talking work and relax?
Drink, have fun ...
God!
Tell me about the "unique".
One that left heart.
You are trying to stop with my thing, right?
Não, só estou interessada to know what made it so.
Well, for your information
was more than one.
It was like a parade.
Women codependent, infiéis,
deprimidas, narcisistas, falsas.
Women actually did not like me.
When I was 30 years, saw only aguenta bad relationships
to discover that There is good relationship.
Not believe that there is a good relationship?
Surely.
Hello, I bring you something?
- One of these, please. - A Mojito. Anything else?
- Yes, a little water. - With or without gas?
- From the same tap. Thank you. - From the tap. Okay.
What? What?
It's the same thing, right?
So they say.
Venha, vamos dançar.
No, really.
Have seen your little dance. Now I want to see the truth.
- I can not dance well. - I know. Mais ou menos.
Mike, não.
No.
We have an early flight tomorrow. We must go.
Is. We must go.
The car will take us down there 8am. Want me to call?
- No, the reception will connect. - Yeah, good idea.
Had a great tonight.
Me too.
My floor. Até amanhã.
8am.
- Boa noite. - Boa noite.
- Yes, good evening.
It was fun.
I think you should go, right?
Is.
Good night.
What the hell was that?
Why do I want to do it again?
- Miss me? - Colin?
- I expected someone else? - No.
How can not go Lake Tahoe, I decided to come.
How did you know you were here?
Joy told me. Comecei a pensar everything we would do there.
Come here. I decided I could not wait.
- Want some champagne? - Yes.
Great.
I'm so happy to be here.
- What? - Nothing. You surprised me.
He said it was spontaneous.
Yeah, I said.
There's something coming to you. 'll Love.
God! Sai muito rápido, não?
I think we'll be naked sooner than I thought.
- I'll get a towel. - Okay.
Abby, I ...
I really want to do it again, not just tonight.
Crap.
Courage! You can do this.
You are not room service.
How you doing, man?
Good to see you. I. ..
I came to tell Abby about a mudança na hora do voo.
But I can come back later.
- Oi - Oi
What are you doing here?
The time of flight changed.
8 am.
But I already told you.
Foi um dia longo e cheio.
Well, I'm coming.
Mike.
Hold on.
He came to me a surprise.
It's that convenient.
No, I que fosse você à porta.
I think all are subject to change.
I taught you well.
Talvez possa até present the program.
Tell me what happened the elevator.
I say to Colin to go?
No.
Por que levantar a âncora agora?
Worked hard to get here.
Is that so? That's all I have to say?
Whatever I say?
The truth is laid bare, not?
It's what I have been trying tell.
Goodbye.
Sorry about that.
Não, sério, no problem.
Come here.
The rest of the night is ours.
In the first of many romantic evenings to come.
Colin, why do you like me?
É linda.
Smart.
Nunca critica. Never try control the situation.
I have to say, is a relief ...
because I know several women controllers, a nightmare.
And I love that it is not.
But I am. Sou exatamente assim.
O que quer dizer?
This should be frozen. But know that.
And, as horrible as it seems ...
He was editing his speech all the time.
And at the time gave me caviar, suffered physical pain.
I hate to be fed as a baby.
It's how I am controlling.
But he could not show So why ...
who would love someone like that?
Nobody.
Sorry.
You are great, really.
So I have to talk I was not myself.
Not for a second during the time we were together.
So who have you been?
A garota que um idiota told me to be.
Good morning, Freddy.
What did you do?
Nothing, he lost the flight alone.
He resigned.
Received a call from a local affiliate and was hired.
The corporation is furious. What happened?
He resigned to go to the local competitor?
We do not need it. Thousands of idiots like him around.
Better to be right.
If you do not get another until the end week, will be canceled.
Find today.
It was just a joke, folks.
I do not believe I got to feel something for him.
Felt enough to end with Colin.
Sorry. Here are the substitutes Chadway.
Yes, no, yes, no, not at all.
No way, right.
What did you think of the new set?
Adorei.
KSXP has the rights to the name of program, then renamed to
"Morning Madness with Mike."
- Love it. - This is Joe, his new producer.
Hi
You know what like you, Joe?
I do not want sex with you.
I am relieved.
Como está meu rosto, muito brilhante?
Which side is better, direito, esquerdo, frontal?
All great. Vamos pass again.
I am Jack Magnum and this is ...
"The naked truth.
Certo, melhor esquecer essa coisa de arma...
What? É minha marca registrada!
A não ser que a NRA pague sua hipoteca este mês,
digo "esqueça a arma"!
Live at five four, three, two, one.
- Do you think the guy is good? - Better to be.
I'm Jack and this Magnum is "The naked truth.
- Paz. - My God, became a politician.
Vamos fazer umas perguntas ao piloto do balão,
sobre a frequência que os casais transam voando e cortamos.
Sure.
Olhe lá, seu substitute is in the air.
My what?
Seu substituto?
Most are watching for learn to get girls.
I assure you are in good hands.
They are looking for a guy who had sex with 137 women.
Most were conscious.
What beautiful thing.
Now we are in balloon festival
and I should count as homens são cheios de ar quente.
We all know that are women who are full of garbage.
And just because they say "no" does not mean it's true.
If that were the case, eu só teria tido 90 mulheres...
Certo, tudo bem.
- What the hell? - Have you seen ...
Came back. Seems had technical problems.
It is a festival with wine ...
Got it.
Came back.
Sorry, but Jack Magnum não fará mais o programa.
What should not be surprising because men are not reliable.
What is she doing?
Yes, Harold.
We are doing that.
Mike Chadway, for example.
He left the program without telling anyone.
You think you know what they will do, what they do.
Mas quando chega o momento, when they have to act ...
they panic.
I'm sick of this.
- Aonde vai? Entraremos em 2min! - It's going well, no?
The men strong and courageous we see in books
and films since she was nine,
are a fraud, do not exist.
Men are not strong, nor courageous.
Men are afraid.
It's all combined, Andy Kaufman-style.
Even if they have a moment
in a hotel elevator,
super romantic and potential
homens são incapazes de agir.
Why?
Men are weak.
Let me tell something about women.
Women want to believe they are victims.
Que partimos seus hearts for fun.
Thought he had resigned.
I said he would return.
They say they want true love.
But just want a lista de coisas.
It's perfect, handsome, doctor?
If you meet the criteria,
do not be fooled, because there are sleeping with you.
They're sleeping with a list cuidadosamente calculada
chance of selling.
Money more than character,
beauty more than soul
chivalry more what principles.
No gesture however real or romantic
worth more than a list of credentials.
This comes from a man who never made a gesture beyond that.
An elevator was not a gesture?
The lift was a moment of passion.
Followed by a moment panic on his part.
Pânico? I went to your room.
Yes! And ran.
It was not panic, dear.
I was not trying to compete with a lista ambulante na sua cama.
Should thank me.
We have 10 seconds.
Ready to fly away?
This is what we have, friends. This is "The naked truth."
A girl to two guys choose the best curriculum.
It's all nonsense.
Corta!
I hate you so much word spoken on TV.
No, you hate yourself for be so shallow.
Here we go!
- Where are we going? - The anywhere with you!
What a surprise, you're running!
Not recommend.
Keep up the cameras on board.
What are you doing? God! What about you?
They do not know are in the air, you know?
Is there any way to tell them?
- No. - They are going to swear.
So, who wants champagne?
I have an idea.
Why do not you tell me how much they enjoyed
Colin transando in Los Angeles?
Colin finished in Los Angeles, idiot.
On the left you can see ...
What?
Now awakened interest.
If you think we will end the we started, is beside himself.
He lost his chance.
Never had a chance with you.
And the right we see the beautiful Sacramento River,
winding by the landscape dichromatic.
Pode parar de falar, please? Thank you.
You're right. I had an error trial momentary
When I thought it was more que é, mas claramente não é.
And what do you mean?
'm Mike Chadway, like Climbing like a monkey.
Do not fall in love. Is appalling.
For the love of God, began.
Yes, it's frightening. Terrible.
Especially when is in love with a crazy.
I'm not crazy!
Passionate?
I just say that I love and all you heard was crazy?
You are the definition of neurotic!
The definition of a neurotic is person suffering from anxiety,
obsessive thoughts, compulsive acts and
and physical symptoms without any evidence ...
Quiet!
I said I love you, and you is giving lessons in vocabulary.
You are in love with me.
Why?
No idea.
But I am.
You're incredible.
- Am. - It's a god.
- Really? - God.
'm So good?
Or are you pretending?
You'll never know.